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Octoproblem

My teacher said to calculate
3.141 times 8.
I threw my hand up instantly
and so, of course, she called on me.
She asked me, “What’s the answer, please?”
I’d figured this one out with ease.
I looked her squarely in the eye
and calmly answered, “Octopi!”
It took her half an hour to get it,
and then she gave me extra credit.

–Kenn Nesbitt

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The Bagel Bird

The Bagel Bird, by all accounts,
is said to lunch on large amounts
of sticks and twigs and sand and stones
and plastic parts from broken phones.
He’ll nibble bits of copper wires
and rubber from discarded tires.
He’ll chomp on tops of cuckoo clocks
and swallow shorts and stinky socks.

He’ll chew your shoes and eat your hat.
He’ll bite your books and baseball bat.
He’ll stuff his lips with poker chips
and snack on sails from sailing ships
and gobble poles and bowling balls
and pick at bricks from fallen walls
and graze on grass and feed on weeds
and dine on twine and strings of beads.

But bagels… whether white or wheat,
or salted, savory, or sweet,
or topped with lox or luncheon meat,
are something he will never eat.
At least that’s what I’ve always heard
about the crazy Bagel Bird.
But I don’t mind because, you see,
that leaves more bagels just for me.

–Kenn Nesbitt

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My Mother Makes Prickly Pear Pastries

My mother makes prickly pear pastries.
My mother makes prickly pear pies.
She’s known for her prickly pear donuts
and flavorful prickly pear fries.

She sometimes makes prickly pear muffins
or prickly pear cookies and cakes.
She likes making prickly pear pizzas
and prickly pear smoothies and shakes.

I’ll bet she could write a whole cookbook
with all kinds of prickly pear food.
I’m sure you’d have no trouble guessing
what every last page would include.

I might even like her concoctions,
and wouldn’t just snicker and scoff,
if once in a while she’d remember
to take all the prickly parts off.

–Kenn Nesbitt

Check out the winning poems from the 2012 TFK Poetry Contest

From www.timeforkids.com: More than 1,000 kids entered this year’s TIME For Kids Poetry Contest. Poet Kenn Nesbitt chose the winners. “I had an amazing time reading the poems,” he says. All the winners will receive a copy of Nesbitt’s book of poetry The Tighty Whitey Spider. Click here to watch a video of the funny poet read one of his own rhymes for TFK.

Ready for a chuckle? Click here to read these silly rhymes from this year’s winners.

Now that National Poetry Month 2012 is officially underway, there are a lot of great new resource being published on the web. At No Water River, Renee LaTulippe’s will be interviewing a number of poets this month, and posting videos of them reciting their poems. The first interview is with yours truly, and you can also see a video of me reciting my poem “My Hamster Has a Skateboard.”

Be sure to check back regularly at No Water River to see all of the videos  and interviews that Renee has planned for this month.

Do you like hummingbirds? Do you like writing poems? Would you like to win a prize? Hummingbird-guide.com is hosting their second annual Kids Hummingbird Poetry Contest here.

The contest is open to kids ages 6-12. Winners will receive a free hummingbird feeder. The deadline for submissions is September 30, 2012 and winners will be announced October 31, 2012.

But there’s no need to wait. You can submit your own original hummingbird poem now. Good luck to you!

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Eric Ode is a children’s poet, songwriter, and entertainer, and the author of two poetry collections for kids: When You’re a Pirate Dog: And Other Pirate Poems and Tall Tales of the Wild West (And a Few Short Ones). In this episode of the Poetry4kids Podcast, Eric talks about his newest book, and even shares a poem and a song.

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I Raised My Hand in Class

I raised my hand in class this morning,
sitting in the back.
The teacher didn’t see, I think.
Instead she called on Jack.

I stretched my hand up higher,
but she called on Zach and Zoe.
I started bouncing up and down,
but, still, she called on Chloe.

I waved my arms but, even so,
she didn’t call on me.
She called on Bryan, Brooklyn, Billy,
Bailey, Ben, and Bree.

She called on Taylor, Tristan, Thomas,
Trinity, and Ty.
Then, finally, she called my name.
I breathed a heavy sigh.

She asked me for the answer.
I just frowned and clenched my knees,
and said, “I’ve no idea,
but could I use the bathroom, please?”

–Kenn Nesbitt

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The Man from Timbuktu

I’ll tell you of a man I knew
who claimed he came from Timbuktu.
He said, “I have the world to see!”
So off he went to Timbukthree.
Then Timbukfour and Timbukfive
were where he seemed to come alive.

He went to Timbuksix and -seven,
and Timbukeight, -nine, -ten, -eleven.
Then Timbuktwelve and -thirteen too,
he liked them more than Timbuktu.
The last I heard, he’s doing fine.
He lives in Timbukninetynine.

So, kids, if all you ever do
is take a trip to Timbuktu,
at least you’ll have a lot more fun
than staying home in Timbukone.
But if you have the world to see…
continue on to Timbukthree.

–Kenn Nesbitt

Poetry4kids.com has several app available for Android, iOS, and mobile users, including the following:

Android

• Poetry4kids.com App
• RhymeNow Rhyming Dictionary

iPhone / iPad / iPod Touch

• My Foot Fell Asleep by Kenn Nesbitt
• RhymeFree FREE Rhyming Dictionary
• RhymeNow Rhyming Dictionary
• Kenn Nesbitt’s Funny Riddles for Kids
• Kenn Nesbitt’s Spooky Riddles for Kids

Mobile Browsers

• Poetry4kids.com Mobile Website