My Excellent Education

A Funny School Poem for Kids

From the book Revenge of the Lunch Ladies

How to juggle.
How to hop.
How to make
my knuckles pop.

How to whinny.
How to cluck.
How to talk
like Donald Duck.

How to wiggle
both my ears.
How to fake
convincing tears.

How to yo-yo.
Capture flies.
Roll my tongue
and cross my eyes.

How to make a
piggy snout.
How to make
my eyes bug out.

These are things
I learned in school.
Ain't it cool?

--Kenn Nesbitt


Copyright © 2007 Kenn Nesbitt. All Rights Reserved.

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This poem appears in the book
Revenge of the Lunch Ladies


On May 3, 2013 rachel from michigan wrote:
omg lol funny i like this poem
On Mar 19, 2013 Nathan from U.S. wrote:
That is the best Education EVER!!! All of those are useful tricks
On Oct 22, 2012 renisha from uae wrote:
its a superb poem...i wish you would write any poem like a inspector coming to school an d how scared and nervous we are
On Sep 4, 2012 Sophie C from NZ wrote:
I love all these poems and i would like u to write more
On Mar 21, 2012 JUAN M. from PASCO WA wrote:
It was so funny and... Cool

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Reading Level of this Poem

Teachers may find this information useful. Please note that Lexile Measures are intended for prose, not poetry. So, technically, the Lexile Measure of any poem should be NP (for non-prose). Nevertheless, this information is frequently requested, so I provide the Lexile Measure for this poem as if it were prose. The Grade Level Average, below, may be a more accurate guide to the reading level of this poem.

Lexile Text Measure: 150L
  Grade Level Measures
ATOS Level: 1.7
Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level: 0.2
Gunning-Fog Index: 3
SMOG Index: 2.8
Automated Readability Index: -0.5
Grade Level Average: 1.4
  Text Statistics
Word Count: 71 words
Line Count: 24 lines
Average Line Length: 3 words
Average Sentence Length: 5.1 words
Average Word Length: 3.8 letters


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