Topic: School

Our Teacher’s Not a Zombie

Our teacher’s not a zombie.
She’s not the living dead,
although she’s looking ragged
and her eyes are rather red.

She shuffles to the classroom.
She slowly drags her feet.
She shambles to the whiteboard
looking broken-down and beat.

We listen to her plaintive moans.
We see the way she strains.
We hear her mumble mournfully
about the students’ brains.

But we know not to worry.
We never get upset.
She’s always like this when she
hasn’t had her coffee yet.

My Puppy Ate My Earbuds

My puppy ate my earbuds.
My puppy ate my socks.
My puppy chewed my tennis shoes
and all my Lego blocks.

He gnawed upon my iPod
as if it were a bone.
He nibbled my Nintendo Switch
and munched my mobile phone.

He grazed upon my skateboard,
consumed my catcher’s mitts,
and chomped my chess and checkers sets
to tiny little bits.

He polished off my pillow,
my blanket, and my sheet.
My homework seems to be the
only thing he will not eat.

Dear Summer

Dear Summer, you’re always my favorite.
I really do like you a lot.
You come every year,
and I’m glad when you’re here.
I don’t even mind that you’re hot.

Dear Summer, whenever you visit,
I love to go outside to play.
I get to wear shorts
and play summertime sports,
or sometimes do nothing all day.

I put on my goggles and swim suit,
and head for the beach or the park.
I go for a hike
or I ride on my bike,
and stay awake long after dark.

Dear Summer, I’m glad you could join us.
without you, it won’t be the same.
I promise I know
that you do have to go,
but, still, it seems sort of a shame.

I’m sure that I’m going to miss you.
The school year is finally here.
I had so much fun
playing out in the sun.
I guess that I’ll see you next year.

Elementary

elementary

“Elementary.”
That means “easy.”
I don’t find it
quite so breezy.

Learn addition.
Then subtraction.
Multiply.
Divide a fraction.
Spelling. Science.
Reading. Writing.
Social studies.
Speech reciting.
Testing. Testing.
Still more Testing.
Not much recess.
Not much resting.

I complained but
no one listened.
Maybe elementary
isn’t.

Back-to-School Shopping

back-to-school-shopping

My sleeves are too short
and my jeans are too tight.
My shirt is so small
that it doesn’t fit right.

My hat is too snug
and my socks all have holes.
My shoes are worn out
on the sides and the soles.

My mom says it’s time
to go shopping for more.
She wants me to get
some new clothes at the store.

She begs and cajoles,
but I simply say, “No.
I want to stay home.
I would rather not go.”

While new ones may fit
in the sleeves and the toes,
the old ones I have
are my favorite clothes.

The All-Bean Diet

the-all-bean-diet

Beans for breakfast.
Beans for lunch.
Beans for dinner.
Beans for brunch.
Beans for snacks
and all desserts.
Beans until your
stomach hurts.

This is called
the “All-Bean Diet.”
Man, it’s fun!
You have to try it!
True, it gives you
painful gas…
Still, it sure does
clear the class!

Jim Sox

jim-sox

He’s “Mr. Athletic,”
the coolest of jocks,
the school’s fastest runner:
His name is Jim Sox.

He’s fearsome at football,
terrific at tennis.
At baseball and basketball
Jim is a menace.

He’s always the winner.
There isn’t a sport
where Jim doesn’t rule
as the king of the court.

He’s equally blessed
on the field and the rink,
but all of that exercise
gives him a stink.

And so in our schoolyard
the greatest of knocks
is telling a person,
“You smell like Jim Sox.”

Octoproblem

octoproblem

My teacher said to calculate
3.141 times 8.
I threw my hand up instantly
and so, of course, she called on me.
She asked me, “What’s the answer, please?”
I’d figured this one out with ease.
I looked her squarely in the eye
and calmly answered, “Octopi!”
It took her half an hour to get it,
and then she gave me extra credit.

I Raised My Hand in Class

i-raised-my-hand-in-class

I raised my hand in class this morning,
sitting in the back.
The teacher didn’t see, I think.
Instead she called on Jack.

I stretched my hand up higher,
but she called on Zach and Zoe.
I started bouncing up and down,
but, still, she called on Chloe.

I waved my arms but, even so,
she didn’t call on me.
She called on Bryan, Brooklyn, Billy,
Bailey, Ben, and Bree.

She called on Taylor, Tristan, Thomas,
Trinity, and Ty.
Then, finally, she called my name.
I breathed a heavy sigh.

She asked me for the answer.
I just frowned and clenched my knees,
and said, “I’ve no idea,
but could I use the bathroom, please?”

My Very Long Poem

my-very-long-poem

M
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I

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w
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.

S
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w
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