Newest Poems

Here are my newest poems for you to read and rate. I post new poems as I write them, so please check back often. Have fun!

Dear Santa, Did You Get My Tweet?
Dear Santa, Did You Get My Tweet?
Santa Brought a Bar of Soap
Santa Brought a Bar of Soap
Coal in My Stocking
Coal in My Stocking
Autumn Is the Time of Year
Autumn Is the Time of Year
November Is Upon Us
November Is Upon Us
My Baby Brother's Birthday
My Baby Brother's Birthday
I'd Like to Meet an Alien
I'd Like to Meet an Alien
Nobody Touch My Tarantula Sandwich
Nobody Touch My Tarantula Sandwich
Halloween Cuisine
Halloween Cuisine

Most Popular Poems

Right now, these are the most popular poems on the website, as rated by you! These will change as you rate more poems!

Coal in My Stocking
Coal in My Stocking
My Puppy Punched Me In the Eye
My Puppy Punched Me In the Eye
Xbox, Xbox
Xbox, Xbox
My Teacher Took My iPod
My Teacher Took My iPod
All My Great Excuses
All My Great Excuses
My Teacher Calls Me Sweetie Cakes
My Teacher Calls Me Sweetie Cakes
My Puppy Ate My Earbuds
My Puppy Ate My Earbuds
My Lunch
My Lunch
Swimming Ool
Swimming Ool

More, More, More Funny Poems...

And here are a whole lot more of my most recent poems, along with a few older favorites. These poems are also ranked by popularity (with the most popular ones at the top), so don't be surprised if they change position when you rate them.

Please Don't Read This Poem
Please Don't Read This Poem
My Mother Said to Do My Chores
My Mother Said to Do My Chores
I Taught My Cat to Clean My Room
I Taught My Cat to Clean My Room
My Dog Lives On the Sofa
My Dog Lives On the Sofa
I Bought a Maserati
I Bought a Maserati
Welcome Back to School
Welcome Back to School
Basketball's My Favorite Sport
Basketball's My Favorite Sport
Cookies for Santa
Cookies for Santa
April Fool's Day
April Fool's Day
Wayne the Stegosaurus
Wayne the Stegosaurus
My Hamster Has a Skateboard
My Hamster Has a Skateboard
My Brother's Not a Werewolf
My Brother's Not a Werewolf
The Armpit of Doom
The Armpit of Doom
My Teacher Ate My Homework
My Teacher Ate My Homework
My Dog Ate My Homework
My Dog Ate My Homework
For My Brother, On His Birthday
For My Brother, On His Birthday
My Family's Fond of Gadgets
My Family's Fond of Gadgets
I'm Staying Home From School Today
I'm Staying Home From School Today
I Didn't Go Camping
I Didn't Go Camping
I Raised My Hand in Class
I Raised My Hand in Class
My Puppy Likes the Water
My Puppy Likes the Water
I Went to the Barber
I Went to the Barber
That Explains It!
That Explains It!
A Reindeer for Christmas
A Reindeer for Christmas
Class Gas
Class Gas
I Think My Dad is Dracula
I Think My Dad is Dracula
My Puppy Plays Piano
My Puppy Plays Piano
Don't Ever Bite Your Sister
Don't Ever Bite Your Sister
Nicknames
Nicknames
The Seefood Diet
The Seefood Diet
At History I'm Hopeless
At History I'm Hopeless
Waiter, There's a Dog in My Soup
Waiter, There's a Dog in My Soup
Our Teacher Sings the Beatles
Our Teacher Sings the Beatles
I Never Want to Go to Bed
I Never Want to Go to Bed
November Is Upon Us
November Is Upon Us
Gerbil, Gerbil, On the Run
Gerbil, Gerbil, On the Run
Pet Shopping
Pet Shopping
My Mom's Spaghetti
My Mom's Spaghetti
My Dog Does My Homework
My Dog Does My Homework
Today I Had a Rotten Day
Today I Had a Rotten Day
The Tighty-Whity Spider
The Tighty-Whity Spider
I'd Like to Meet an Alien
I'd Like to Meet an Alien
I Bought Our Cat a Jetpack
I Bought Our Cat a Jetpack
I Knew a Guy
I Knew a Guy
Halloween is Nearly Here
Halloween is Nearly Here
My Personal Slave
My Personal Slave
The Teachers Jumped Out of the Windows
The Teachers Jumped Out of the Windows
I Love Me
I Love Me
My Kitten Won't Stop Talking
My Kitten Won't Stop Talking
My Pig Won't Let Me Watch TV
My Pig Won't Let Me Watch TV
Mirror, Mirror
Mirror, Mirror
The Aliens Have Landed!
The Aliens Have Landed!
You Can Never Be Too Careful
You Can Never Be Too Careful
My Mouse is Misbehaving
My Mouse is Misbehaving
I'm Not Picky
I'm Not Picky
A Fish in a Spaceship
A Fish in a Spaceship
Our Teacher's Not a Zombie
Our Teacher's Not a Zombie
I'm Absolutely Full Tonight
I'm Absolutely Full Tonight
You Can Argue with a Tennis Ball
You Can Argue with a Tennis Ball
A Valentine for Mom
A Valentine for Mom
Electronic Christmas
Electronic Christmas
I Love to Do the Laundry
I Love to Do the Laundry
This Morning is Our History Test
This Morning is Our History Test
My Sister Thinks She's Santa Claus
My Sister Thinks She's Santa Claus
The Biggest Burp Ever
The Biggest Burp Ever
Santa Brought a Bar of Soap
Santa Brought a Bar of Soap
Today I Wrote this Poem
Today I Wrote this Poem
School Supplies
School Supplies
My Parents Sent Me To the Store
My Parents Sent Me To the Store
Dear Santa, Here's My Christmas List
Dear Santa, Here's My Christmas List
I Bought a New Banana Suit
I Bought a New Banana Suit
Digging for Diamonds
Digging for Diamonds
My Dog Likes to Disco
My Dog Likes to Disco
My Sister's Pretty Picky
My Sister's Pretty Picky
I Don't Know What to Do Today
I Don't Know What to Do Today
I'm Building a Rocket
I'm Building a Rocket
My Dog is Not the Smartest Dog
My Dog is Not the Smartest Dog
On the Thirty Third of Januaugust
On the Thirty Third of Januaugust
My Cat Goes Flying Through the Air
My Cat Goes Flying Through the Air
I Ran for the Chapstick
I Ran for the Chapstick
I Played a Game
I Played a Game
Halloween Party
Halloween Party
I Think I'm Related to Bigfoot
I Think I'm Related to Bigfoot
I Often Contradict Myself
I Often Contradict Myself
My Parents Are Making Me Crazy
My Parents Are Making Me Crazy
The Marvelous Homework and Housework Machine
The Marvelous Homework and Housework Machine
My Bunny Lies Over My Doggy
My Bunny Lies Over My Doggy
Sharpen, Sharpen, Sharpen
Sharpen, Sharpen, Sharpen
The Toughest Pastry Maker
The Toughest Pastry Maker
Mashed Potatoes on the Ceiling
Mashed Potatoes on the Ceiling
My Dog Plays Invisible Frisbee
My Dog Plays Invisible Frisbee
Mr. Obvious
Mr. Obvious
My Dog Fred
My Dog Fred
My Robot's Misbehaving
My Robot's Misbehaving
Perfect
Perfect

Read 'em All? Want More?

What!? You finished reading everything on this page and you want more? Well then, I guess you'll just have to click here to read my books.

Poems by Category

Click here if you would rather view the poems on this website organized by category.